Be your Future Self now

주요 Chapter

• Without hope in your future, your present loses meaning
• Your future drives your present
• The more vividand detailed your Future Self, the faster you’ll progress
• Failing as your Future Self is better than succeeding as your current self

“To be or not to be? That is the question.”

Without hope in your future, your present loses meaning

Humans are not driven by the past, we’re pulled forward by the future we’re most committed to.

(21p.) People have the ability to not only think about our own future, but to haVe countless potential scenarios for our future. Additionally, humans are able to contemplate deeply on our potential prospects.

(21p.) Psychologists call this unique human ability prospection; as people, everything we do is driven by our prospects of the future. … all human action and behavior as driven by goals - whether short term or long term.

(23p.) All goals or motivations fit within two categories: approach or avoid. The reason for doing anything is either to approach something you want to happen, or to avoid something you don’t want to happen. As a rule, 80 percent of people are driven by approach and courage.

(25p.) Being driven by fear is a lower state of consciousness than being driven by courage and vision. Deep emotional development is required to transition beyond fear as your driver to levels of acceptance, courage and love as reason for action

(25p.) long term, love-based is the path to a successful and happy life. Your view of your Future Self is the compass that draws you forward.

(27p.) Decisions and actions are best when reverse-engineered from a desired outcome. Start with what you want and work backward. Think and act from your goal. rather than toward your goal.

The clearer you are on where you want to go, the less distracted you’ll be by endless options. ⇒ 이 책을 읽기 며칠 전 친구와 나에게 해주었던 말이기도하다. “목표가 명확하면 주변의 환경이 바뀌는 것에 덜 흔들리지 않을까? 너가 정말 원하는 것이 뭔지 고민해봐”라고 해주었었는데, 수만은 선택지와 바뀌는 환경에서 어떤게 옳은 선택일지 (그것은 사실 선택하고 난 후 의 나의행동에 따라 더 크게 좌우되는 것인데도..) 갈팡질팡하고 있는 나에게 필요했던 구절이다.

(36p.)Once you are clear and committed, everything wil filter through your goal - selective attentino.

(37p.) You’ll stop associating pain with the work and changes required for your golas. Instead, you’ll associate pain with not making progress toward your dreams.

You’ll be far more courageous.

(39p.) The first step is to decide who our Future Self will be, and BE your Future Self now.

→ 요즘 정말 용기와 자신감이 언제부터인가 떨어졌다고 생각했고, 내가 그리는 명확한 나의 미래가 없기 때문에 더더욱 그렇지 않았을까 하는 생각.

(39p.) The first step is to decide who our Future Self will be, and BE your Future Self now.

Without hope in your future, your present loses meaning

→ 소제목부터 너무 공감되었다. 미래에 대한 기대, 혹은 내 주변 사람들에 대한 기대, 나에 대한 기대가 없을 때 행복한 삶을 살기란 어렵다는 것.

The present is meaningless unless connected to the future. it is the future that dictates which decisions you opt for.

Those without a future stop finding ways to make life better. They become pure victims of external circumstances with no agency over their lives

⇒ 약 1~2년 전의 나의 모습? 미래에 대한 기대나 장기적인 목표가 없는 상태에서 하루 하루를 무사히 마무리하는 것이 최선이었던 그 때는 삶의 주인 의식이 많이 낮았던 것 같다.

Without hope, motivation is impossible. You can’t be motivated toward action or outcome with zero hope in its possibility.

• 동기부여가 왜 잘 안될까 혹은 어떻게 하면 스스로 동기부여할 수 있을까를 고민하고, 번아웃으로만 설명하려고 했던 때가 있다. 지금 생각하면 팀, 내 자신에 대한 기대가 없다면 동기부여란 너무 어렵다. 더 나아질 수 있다는 믿음, 어떤 문제를 개선하려고 할 때 그것을 충분히 해낼 수 있다는 신뢰가 없다면 시도조차 하기 어렵다.
• 2024년 앞으로의 내 삶에 대한 기대가 조그맣게 생겼을 때, 엄청난 동기부여가 되는 것을 느끼게 되었고 ‘기대감’이라는 것이 얼마나 삶에 있어서 중요한 것인지 느꼈었고, 올해 초 self integrity 회고를 하면서도 ‘기대’라는 키워드가 올해 너무나도 나에게 중요한 키워드라고 느꼈다. 이 책에서도 내가 느꼈던 것을 정확히 똑같이 말하고 있어서 반갑기도, 다시한번 중요성을 느끼기도했다.

High-hope people find multiple pathways to reach their goals and willingly try new approaches. Low-hope people, on the other hand, stick with one approach and do not try other avenues when sty-mied. Instead of using problem-focused thought, the low-hope people often use counterproductive avoidance and disengagement thinking. Reinforced in the short term by their avoidance thoughts, low-hope people continue their passivity. Unfortunately, they do not learn from past experiences. High-hope people, however, use information about not reaching their goals as diagnostic feedback to search for other feasible approaches. 16

Being unaware of your environment creates a random evolution

'환경이 중요하다', '더 좋은 환경에 있어야 한다'라는 말은 참 많이 들어왔지만 내가 그것을 정말 중요하게 생각하고 있지 않았던 것 같다. 익숙한 환경에만 머물러있던 내가 comfort zone을 벗어나야할 필요성을 점점 느꼈고, 그 중요성을 느끼고 있을 때 이 챕터를 읽게 되었다. 이 챕터에서도 환경을 매우 강조한다. 그래서 더는 '환경의 중요성'을 외면하지 않게 되었고, 환경을 스스로 선택하고 control해야겠다고 다짐하게 되었다.

"... Our social interactions are constantly shaping who we are and what we do."

Psychologists found that people prefer things, not because of internal reasons, but simply because they've been repeatedly exposed to them. "Your input determines your outlook."

Do you want better and bigger goals? A better Future Self? Then expose yourself to better perspectives and evolved people. By proactively changing your inputs of information, experiences, and people, you become aware of what you previously didn't know. You see what you previously didn't notice. You seek what you previously didn't want. You act in ways you previously didn't behave.

Is your life the product of your environment, or are you merely reacting to your environment? Are your surroundings governing you, or do you influence your environment? "If we do not create and control our environment, our environment creates and control us"

Freedom comes from not being the direct reaction of your environment. Instead, be aware of your environment, and scan externally for different perspectives and options. Who is the person you want to become? Your answer to this question will, obviously, be influenced by your current context. However, your answer should also extend beyond your current context. Imagination is more important than knowledge.

Urgent battles and small goals keep you stuck

• 매일 하루하루 살기 바쁜 그날의 일과를 마무리하느라 너무 바쁜 나는 뒤돌아보니 제자리걸음을 하는 것 같았던 때가 있었다. 정말 열심히 스프린트를 뛰었는데 오히려 후퇴하고 있는 건 아닐까 불안할 만큼. 지금 생각해보면, 중요한 일보다 급한 일들만 매일매일 쳐내느라 바쁘게 살고 있었다.

If you're living day-to-day, you're always in a hurry. When you're engaged in short-term goals, your time spirals quicker and quicker.

"I have two kinds of problems: the urgent and the important. The urgent are not important, and the important are never urgent.”

When we put the urgent before the important, we never get to the important.

The only way off the day-to-day hamster wheel is to prioritize the important. You give yourself space to think beyond your current context, and really start investing in yourself. Put the important before the urgent.